Things to Consider When Deciding if You Should Let Your Wife Have a Boyfriend
Below is an extensive article covering many angles that can be raised with this question. Please feel free to jump between the clearly marked and divided sections that are most relevant to your situation.
Many people might feel this is a question that you need to ask in secret, or one to be ashamed of, yet it is one of the most highly asked questions dealing with marriage on google. Should I let my wife have a boyfriend? People don’t talk about it much, but we do. Please take comfort in our understanding and respect for your questions and allow us to help you walk through the idea as best we can.
As always, we must say that we are not licensed therapists of any kind and that we only speak from our own position and that nothing we say should be taken as fact. Relationships and people differ greatly and each person should make sure that they understand their experience.
You may be interested in our related article: Should I Let My Wife Have a Girlfriend?
Is It Okay for My Wife to Have a Boyfriend?
To answer the simplest hold up for most people, let us first address the question of whether it is even ok for someones wife to have a boyfriend in addition to their husband. Yes, of course it is okay for your wife to have a boyfriend. If a relationship has open communication, honesty, love, and commitment, a marriage may actually improve if a wife takes an additional partner.
That said, let us dive into some of the things you might want to consider on your journey.
Who's Idea is it For Your Wife to Have a Boyfriend?
Obviously, regardless of who brought the issue up first, if this is to take place, both people in the married couple must end up being on the same page before you undertake this step in your relationship. If there is an imbalance in understanding for both parties about what and why this is occuring, problems may arise. Again, these are some things to consider and by no means should be taken as exhaustive.
Your Wife Has Told You That She Wants to Try Another Man
If your wife has come to you with the proposition that she would like to try adding another man to your relationship you are already in a relatively better position than other men who’s wives might have similar thoughts: she has come to you to make it known that she has this interest. This is preferable to a woman being dishonest and going behind your back to cheat with another man. Take comfort in this fact, and do not immediately react with anger.
Let us take a look at some of the possible motivations behind her desire to date or have sex with another man.
#1. A Break From the Routine
Sometimes people simply need a change of pace. We can all remember one instance where we might have caught someone’s eye glancing over at us, or hearing that someone might have a little crush on you. Those things feel good, they make us feel confident and sexy. Those are important things.
Some would say that we need to focus fully on our partners and push down all desires. And perhaps that is true for some people’s experience. However, if you are lucky enough to be in a relationship where true love and honesty exist, it might be possible to know that both feelings can coexist at the same time. If both parties see the benefit and happiness, it can add dynamic to each of your lives as well as to the marriage as a whole. Maybe you don’t act on them, but acknowledging their reality can be powerful.
Some women even report that having this free time to look forward to outside of the routine that you very much love, but sometimes need a break from. It can remind the woman how sexy and desirable she is to other men – regain her own confidence. In turn, she can bring that confidence and the benefits of a sometimes boxed up sexual and mental release to your marriage. Your sex may become more passionate and your relationships stronger as you dive into each others deepest and truest desires.
To read more about this idea, check out Savannah Whitman’s take on her relationship with another man and how it is affecting her marriage for the better in her article “Having A Lover On The Side Makes Me A Much Better Wife.”
#2. She Wants to Try a Bigger Penis
Above and beyond simply dating another man, there are women who enjoy the idea of an additional experience more directly involving another man and you as her husband. Though many women make it clear that size and power structures in sex do not matter, there are in fact multitudes of possibilities of what turns women on.
Here at Bullwether, we love exploring this dynamic and the deep sexual fulfillment, or lack there of, the partners that have found this dynamic to work go through. If your wife has told you that she desires a man that is bigger in size you may feel belittled or slighted. It is now your choice how to take on the reality of knowing your wife’s true desires and making choices from there on.
This may not bother you, you might well know that your penis is average, below average, or even massive and all of these facts are totally ok and acceptable. You may fully fulfill your wife sexually and know that she loves you. You might even realize that sometimes wish your wife had a Kim Kardashian size ass. These are our feelings and our partners. Do you allow your wife to have her desire or ask her to curb hers as you continue to do? Both are acceptable choices and there can be ways to satisfy this issue without another man.
If she simply wants to try a bigger penis, consider what that means for you and if you are allowed to chase your desires. Both of you can decide that this might make you stronger as a couple and happier in general. You don’t always fall in love with the girl with the big ass, but that doesn’t mean you don’t sometimes want to play with one. Your wife might feel the same. This is where we begin to expand from the question “Should I Let My Wife Have a Boyfriend?” to “Should I Let My Wife Have a Bigger, Better, Stronger, Sexually Fulfilling, Alpha Male while I Learn My Place.”
#3. She Wants to Find a Bull and Make You a Cuckold
The previous statement might be jarring for some, but incredibly arousing for others who might have considered or lived within the bull and cuckold lifestyle. Coming from your wife this might be shocking if phrased this way, possibly there must have been some previous conversation or role play in this area for the conversation to take a serious turn to trying it.
There are many reasons people have the fetishes and desires that they do; many are likely deep rooted and psychological. We hope that you can find your own clarity and follow the desires and fetishes that turn you on, but not be led down a path that ends up making you feel worse or harmed
Often times the suggestion for this lifestyle comes from the man seeking to be cuckolded, but sometimes women can suggest their desire for a bull as well. You must consider that she simply enjoys the idea of having temporary power of a man. It could be that she wants to feel herself released to the fullest extent of her deepest pornographic desires. To be seen as the spoils for a man who is decidedly sexy, strong, confident, and hung.
It goes back to feeling desired, and in this context she is able to feel desired by what she views as a stereotypical alpha. She feels like the winner, she beat out all the other girls for a man that represents the top of the sexual pile. This does not in anyway remove the fact that she loves you, and might raise you above every single other man in every other context: your character, your romance, your career, or any of your other real and important traits. Simply, for that 20 to 30 minute stretch she wants this kind of desire.
Now she can have this without you present, just making you aware of what it is she is searching for. Or she may want to add you into the context fully making you a cuckold. If this is something that is intriguing to you, please follow up further in the search on your role as a cuckold. This added knowledge of “belittling” another man for his size or sexual prowess in connection to the arousal that comes from achieving the desire of her perceived alpha only adds to the feeling of reality that she truly is with the best and biggest as compared to someone smaller and “weaker.
Again this may only be true in the context of this arrangement, and often times men that are cuckolded are not even classically “smaller” or “weaker” it is simply their desire to assist the wives that they love in having the most complete and arousing sexual experience possible.
#4. She is Attracted to a Specific Man
This might give you pause. Your wife has come to you to tell you that she finds a specific man is attractive and would like to try dating him or having sex with him. This all in the context of adding him to the mix, not to remove you. This one will require a deep and honest conversation with your wife.
Is it this specific man that makes you horny? Well that might not be so bad, you likely have women that do the same for you. And we surely can’t be jealous if our wives are attracted to the likes of Brad Pitt. This might be her Brad Pitt and she’s just looking for a romp. Conversely, this may be the first step on a road to her leaving you for this man.
It is difficult to know what will happen down the line even in open and honest relationships. Take caution that there is always a chance that desires might change, it is only important to be ready for the change and understand the possibilities.
You Want Your Wife to Have a Boyfriend
If the primary reason you are wondering if you should let your wife have a boyfriend is because you fear that it is out of social norms or not acceptable, fear not. We find what we find arousing and should not let what other’s perception might be stop us from reaching full enjoyment; instead we should answer the the question can a married women have a boyfriend, thusly. Yes, of course a married woman can have a boyfriend. This is a more common practice then might be known and is often a practice the husband initiates or from which he takes great pleasure.
Let us consider some reasons you might want your wife to have a boyfriend, possible motivations, and whether you should act on it.
- You want to be cuckolded – A normal and very common fantasy/fetish is the bull and cuckold dynamic. The husband can be intimatly involved by being in the room or even participating with size comparisons or humiliation. This can also range to simply wanting to hear about or receive texts from your wife as she is out enjoying a date with another man. This might be considered less “classic” cuckoldry.
- You want your wife to be fulfilled – Perhaps you simply want your wife to have whatever she desires sexually. This is totally achievable in a healthy relationship if honesty is paramount. Perhaps you are not able to satisfy her for a multitude of reasons: sexual performance, health reasons, size, or more. There must be a foundation of trust and commitment of some kind. This might tie into your wife allowing you to further explore what might turn you on as well. This more directly leans into polyamory.
- You think this is a way to get yourself a girlfriend – though this might be true; it might be more likely that your wife allows you to explore if she is doing the same, you have to be careful about your intent and approach. Just sliding past the part where she is being fulfilled with another man, or worse, pretending like you want that for her, just to have your desires met can lead to disagreements in the future. Again, honesty is paramount to the success of this type of relationship shift.
- You want to move into polyamory – this is an altogether separate type of scenario which takes much of what has been discussed here in a largely different direction. If that is your aim, it should be the opening to the conversation, not an afterthought with your desiring your wife to have a boyfriend being your attempt at a trojan horse to polyamory.
Things to Try Before Letting Your Wife Have a Boyfriend
Depending on the reasoning behind you or your wife wanting her to find another man, it might be worth diving into a few things before taking the full plunge on bringing another man into the relationship. If anyone is unsure, this things might help you decide if you’ve fulfilled the fantasy adequately, or want to take it further.
Using Penis Extenders or Large Dildos
There is a long line of products that can satisfy your wife’s desire for a large penis, or for your desire to see her satisfied by one. If you want to be directly involved in pleasuring her and you want to add some size to yourself, there are penis extenders that you can buy from discreet and respected adult sites.
Joy Love Dolls is one such site and carries amazingly advanced sex toys as well as a 9″ Hollow Cum Squirting Strap on in Big White Dick and Big Black Dick. These are hollowed out strap ons that you can slide inside of, giving you and your wife the experience of that big dick while still being able to use that famous “motion of the ocean.” It even cums, making any creampie enthusiasts happy to be able to do so safely.
Big Dildos are also a fun thing to watch, and you can pretty much go as big as you want. Some might have you wondering if that could possibly fit in your wife. If she the kind of woman that wants to try, I’d say there is a pretty good chance that with practice you can be watching her dropping a huge realistic dildo in and out of her while you enjoy.
Below you will see a consistent top sellers in the “huge dildo” category. Doc Johnson’s 8.5″ insertable length is solidly above average, and larger than most women’s alleged “preferred size.” At 2″ in circumference or 6.3″ around, it is girthy, and that is consistently named as the more important trait in penis size. This one also squirts and can be used by your wife on her own to help you fulfill a cuckold fantasy or for her to feel filled.
Male Sex Dolls for Your Wife
If you really want to see your wife ride a realistic man but you or your wife are concerned about the practicality of that, then the option of male love dolls is on the table. Todays dolls are far more realistic than the blow up dolls you might be picturing. Joy Love Dolls makes amazing Male and Female Love Dolls as well as Trans Sex Dolls. You have a myriad of customization options available to you that go beyond what is pictured below. Check it out for yourself at the Male Sex Dolls Page.
In conclusion, we wish you the best on your journey starting with the spark of a question: should I let my wife have a boyfriend. We hope that you have some better grounding on the topic and some possible options to play with before diving fully in. Honesty, openness, and an acceptance that desires are real, and it is up to you are your partner to determine how much of it you are willing to unleash.